"America is built on freedoms - of speech, religion, press, assembly, AK-47s and your face."---Mike Strobel
When all is said and done there is nothing left to say or do.
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.....................Today is as good as it gets, and our tomorrows won't be any better
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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to leave.
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"The trouble with Republicans is that when they get into trouble they start acting like cannibals"-Richard Nixon
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Hit your head?...You will get a rectal exam.
Persaud, 38, was injured while working at a construction site in midtown Manhattan on May 20, 2003. Persaud received eight stitches for a cut over his eyebrow at the hospital, but denied emergency room staffers' request to examine his rectum, the lawyer said. He said doctors told Persaud the exam could help determine whether the accident caused spinal damage.
When Persaud resisted, staffers held him down while he begged, "Please don't do that," Marrone said. Persaud hit a doctor while flailing around, so the staffers gave him a powerful sedative and performed the rectal exam, he said.
Hospital witnesses testified at trial that the exam was never completed, but Marrone said that when Persaud woke up he was handcuffed to a bed and had an oxygen tube down his throat and lubricant in his rectum.
VIA
"I Hate Young People"
I may post one of these every once in a while:
The site "I Hate Young People" is devoted to videos of people, even young people, commenting on what is wrong with young people.
I think I know this woman.
The site "I Hate Young People" is devoted to videos of people, even young people, commenting on what is wrong with young people.
I think I know this woman.
Applied for Social Security
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said ‘Unbutton your shirt.’
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said ‘That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me’ and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, ‘You should have dropped your pants… you might have gotten disability, too.’
via
The woman said ‘Unbutton your shirt.’
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said ‘That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me’ and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, ‘You should have dropped your pants… you might have gotten disability, too.’
via
Hold hands and stick together
I wrote this more than a few years ago to be published in our paper. There was/is a lot of division among the people of our community and I wanted to have my say. Needless to say I never submitted it (I'm a great procrastinator). Instead of deleting it and sending into the netherworld of kilobytes, or is it gigabytes by now, I'm sharing it with you.
I read a Miami Herald columnist Leonard Pitts' article about his daughter starting high school. It made me think about a few things like have we really changed so much now that we are on the other end of the age spectrum. So with apologies to Mr Pitts I wrote the following probably leaning far too heavily on his words.
A key element in his article was a poster in the school hallway that said, "Thirty years from now it won't matter what shoes you wore, how your hair looked, or the jeans you bought. What will matter is what you learned and how you use it." (Which kind of reminds me of the book "All I really need to know I learned in kindergarten" by Robert Fulghum. I will follow up at the end of this with an excerpt from his book)
How true that saying is. If we had been told those very words back in our teen years we too surely would have rolled our eyes, shifted our weight to one leg, and folded our arms until the speaker of the phrase was finished.
Kids in school are mostly concerned with their hair, shoes, jeans, who they are seen speaking with and hang out with. Later in the mature years we look back at such misgivings with a smile recognizing how silly it was and thankful we have escaped from immature trappings. Well I wonder if we have.
We seem to have made excellent use of what we learned in school and life. But then sometimes I wonder if we all have really evolved from being concerned about how others see our physical presence. From what I've observed in my lifetime I think not.
I guess we can blame advertising and the corporate decision about what we should look like this year. After all the 'American Way' is to lay the blame on someone, anyone but our self. We can not be seen driving an old car, with the wrong hair style/cut, wearing the wrong coat in winter, with a person not from the "in crowd" in our car. Do we vote that way too?
We dare not say/write/post a message that we failed at this or that in life. We are not an alcoholic or a drug addict. We don't beat our kids. Nor would we admit to having a compulsive disorder like making sure our clothes were folded just so in the dresser drawer. There is nothing wrong with owning up to such problems in our lives and neither is it necessary to bring it up in our conversations.
My point is that we still try to present ourselves as 'just so' to everyone. Yes, the little cliques are still there although they have evolved somewhat haven't they? Did you stop to say hello and speak with that neighbor down the street...you know, that one you may have only nodded to once or twice over the last ten years you lived there. How do you select those you associate with?
We should circulate with people from all walks of life, all age groups across the financial spectrum. I say this because I think we may have forgotten our roots. Make that OUR ROOTS in all caps. Most of us were fortunate to have lived in a city and gone to a school that included people of many nationalities, races, religions, and all sort of economic backgrounds. What happened? Did you develop prejudices as you grew older or were those prejudices there all along only to come to the surface as you became more isolated from what you disliked?
Have we sold out? Did we turn plain vanilla? Do we deny OUR ROOTS? Or have we become the image Madison Avenue wants us to be? Is it like when we go to a class reunion some thirty, forty years later that we once again become as we were when we were teens...the good opinion of these people is the most important thing your life. Is it that just maybe you will fall short in matters of dress, deportment and general coolness? Is it that others are the barometer of your social acceptance or lack thereof and you so desperately want to be approved by them?
Have we managed to string enough heartbeats together to gain a different perspective. Did we travel through enough passages, and learn the truth of the cliché: Life's only constant is change. Will you find yourself at that class reunion in a room full of strangers wondering how they got so old while you stayed the same?
Have we really changed? Are we just older but not wiser? Do you accept yourself for what you are? Do you accept others for what they are?
I never could write worth a crap...just instructional manuals. I don't know if I was able to come across with what I meant to communicate to those of you that read this or not but like Popeye used to say, "I am what I am. I'm Popeye the sailor man."
Bye y'all and here is what I promised way way up at the top of this far too lengthy article:
From Robert Fulghum's book pages 4, 5 and 6:
-Share everything.
-Play fair.
-Don't hit people.
-Put things back where you found them.
-Clean up your own mess.
-Don't take things that aren't yours.
-Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
-Wash you hands before you eat. Flush.
-Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
-Live a balanced life--learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
-Take a nap every afternoon.
-When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.
-Be aware of wonder.
-Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that. Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup--they all die. So do we.
-And then remember the Dick and Jane books and the first word you learned--the biggest word of all--LOOK.
Everything you need to know is in there somewhere. The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation. Ecology and politics and equality and sane living.
Take any one of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life or your work or your government or your world and it holds true and clear and firm. Think what a better world it would be if we all--the whole world--had cookies and milk about three o'clock every afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had as a basic policy to always put things back where they found them and to clean up their own mess.
And it is still true, no matter how old you are--when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.
Mind reading made easy
All it takes is a little bit of understanding of reading peoples expressions like this example:
Me and God
People used to ask me where I went to church. I would tell them I did not go to a physical church building very often but may have been closer to God than most people in a church.
I was a church going person until the nonsense, like war, overtook me. I became numb to everything for a long time. I was drowning in the idiocy of the world; sick at every turn. A doctor told me to find something to do each day that would relax me such as taking a 30 minute nap...lie down for 30 minutes even if I did not sleep.
One late afternoon after working in the garden tilling the rows and planting seed as I put to tools away I saw my old fishing rod in the corner of the shed. The evening meal was not ready so I decided to walk over the hill to the lake and cast the lure out to make ripples if anything.
I discovered Peace. I found God all over again or more truthfully found him for the first time. From that day on I "fished" every day that ended in 'Y'. I got closer to God there than in a church.
I came across this photo on Flckr and all that came back and had to share it.
I was a church going person until the nonsense, like war, overtook me. I became numb to everything for a long time. I was drowning in the idiocy of the world; sick at every turn. A doctor told me to find something to do each day that would relax me such as taking a 30 minute nap...lie down for 30 minutes even if I did not sleep.
One late afternoon after working in the garden tilling the rows and planting seed as I put to tools away I saw my old fishing rod in the corner of the shed. The evening meal was not ready so I decided to walk over the hill to the lake and cast the lure out to make ripples if anything.
I discovered Peace. I found God all over again or more truthfully found him for the first time. From that day on I "fished" every day that ended in 'Y'. I got closer to God there than in a church.
I came across this photo on Flckr and all that came back and had to share it.
Saving seven dollars
A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex therapist’s office.
The doctor asks, ‘What can I do for you?’
The man says, ‘Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?’
The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees. When the couple finishes, the doctor says, ‘There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse.’
He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says good bye.
The next week, the couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.
This happens several weeks in a row.
The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.
Finally, after 3 months of this routine, the doctor says, ‘I’m sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?’
The man says, ‘We’re not trying to find out anything.
She’s married and we can’t go to her house. I’m married and we can’t go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98 and the Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50 and I get $43 back from Medicare.
The doctor asks, ‘What can I do for you?’
The man says, ‘Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?’
The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees. When the couple finishes, the doctor says, ‘There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse.’
He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says good bye.
The next week, the couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.
This happens several weeks in a row.
The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.
Finally, after 3 months of this routine, the doctor says, ‘I’m sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?’
The man says, ‘We’re not trying to find out anything.
She’s married and we can’t go to her house. I’m married and we can’t go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98 and the Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50 and I get $43 back from Medicare.
The kind of face women find attactive….
A study conducted by UCLA’s Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.
For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.
However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with duct tape over his mouth and a spear lodged in his ass while he is on fire.
No further studies are expected…
For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.
However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with duct tape over his mouth and a spear lodged in his ass while he is on fire.
No further studies are expected…
The Earth shall cleanse itself
This article goes along with my concept that the Earth is a self-cleansing entity. Once things get to the point the Earth is in danger of being permenantly harmed something has to be done. So here we are in need of a good dose of caster oil. The Earth will survive but we may not.
Further evidence at
http://plasticoceans.blogspot.com/
Recent insights from fields such as complexity theory suggest that the very nature of civilization means that ours, like previous civilizations, is destined to collapse sooner or later.
It appears that once a society develops beyond a certain level of complexity it becomes increasingly fragile. Eventually, the tipping point is reached when all the energy and resources available to a society are required just to maintain its existing level of complexity, says archaeologist Joseph Tainter and author of the 1988 book The Collapse of Complex Societies.
Then when the climate changes or barbarians invade, overstretched institutions break down and civil order collapses, aggravated by tightly coupled networks that create the potential for propagating failure across many critical industries.
What emerges is a less complex society, organized on a smaller scale or that has been taken over by another group, and loss of our hard-earned knowledge.
Possible solutions include distributed and decentralized production of vital goods like energy and food and adding redundancy to the electrical grid and other networks.
(Subscription required to read the full article at New Scientist, April 2, 2008)
http://www.newscientist.com/channel/being-human/mg19826501.500-the-demise-of-civilisation-may-be-inevitable.html
Further evidence at
http://plasticoceans.blogspot.com/
Recent insights from fields such as complexity theory suggest that the very nature of civilization means that ours, like previous civilizations, is destined to collapse sooner or later.
It appears that once a society develops beyond a certain level of complexity it becomes increasingly fragile. Eventually, the tipping point is reached when all the energy and resources available to a society are required just to maintain its existing level of complexity, says archaeologist Joseph Tainter and author of the 1988 book The Collapse of Complex Societies.
Then when the climate changes or barbarians invade, overstretched institutions break down and civil order collapses, aggravated by tightly coupled networks that create the potential for propagating failure across many critical industries.
What emerges is a less complex society, organized on a smaller scale or that has been taken over by another group, and loss of our hard-earned knowledge.
Possible solutions include distributed and decentralized production of vital goods like energy and food and adding redundancy to the electrical grid and other networks.
(Subscription required to read the full article at New Scientist, April 2, 2008)
http://www.newscientist.com/channel/being-human/mg19826501.500-the-demise-of-civilisation-may-be-inevitable.html
Y did the chicken cross the road?
Well I like all of these but my personal one is: To proove to the opossum that it could be done.
DR. PHIL : The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
GEORGE W. BUSH : We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...
DR SEUSS : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY : To die in the rain. Alone.
GRANDPA : In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
JOHN LENNON Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your chick book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra..#&&^(C% reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
DR. PHIL : The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
GEORGE W. BUSH : We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...
DR SEUSS : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY : To die in the rain. Alone.
GRANDPA : In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
JOHN LENNON Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your chick book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra..#&&^(C% reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
Creepy word/letter game
Think of a letter between A and W.
Repeat it out loud as you scroll down.
Keep going . . . Don’t stop … .
Think of an animal that begins with that letter.
Repeat it out loud as you scroll down.
Think of either a man’s/woman’s name that begins with the last letter in the animals name
Almost there……..
Now count out the letters in that name on the fingers of the hand you are not using to scroll down.
Take the hand you FIRST counted with and hold it out in front of you at face level.
Look at your palm very closely…
…and notice the lines in your hand.
Do the lines take tform of the first letter in the persons name?!
Of course not……
Now TAKE THAT HAND AND smack yourself, get a life, and quit playing stupid games!
Repeat it out loud as you scroll down.
Keep going . . . Don’t stop … .
Think of an animal that begins with that letter.
Repeat it out loud as you scroll down.
Think of either a man’s/woman’s name that begins with the last letter in the animals name
Almost there……..
Now count out the letters in that name on the fingers of the hand you are not using to scroll down.
Take the hand you FIRST counted with and hold it out in front of you at face level.
Look at your palm very closely…
…and notice the lines in your hand.
Do the lines take tform of the first letter in the persons name?!
Of course not……
Now TAKE THAT HAND AND smack yourself, get a life, and quit playing stupid games!
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